Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Channelling Gordon

Ramsay that is, not the Sperm Donor.

If any of you have heard an odd bellowing in the CBD over the last half hour, it was me. I have just intervened in an altercation between a pastry chef (Fijian Indian) and a member of the floor staff (Sri Lankan).

My words were along the lines of this: "I don't fucking care who is fucking lying, just get the fucking scones on to the fucking plate and down to the client. They should have fucking been there 10 fucking minutes ago".

It seems that the effects of my last major screaming outburst (Lions Tour 2005) have worn off, but I think I have now sufficiently let the current kitchen staff know what I am capable of.

I predict that all my departments catering is going to be ready well ahead of time for the foreseeable future.

12 comments:

Bryan Spondre said...

Wow, I'm jealous. I don't have any excuse to shout and scream where I work. Everyone is so damn good at their jobs.

unPC lesbian said...

Yes, but your staff are probably being paid a respectable salary. Here sadly we have to work on the peanuts/monkey principle.

I don't ususally subscribe to the Gordon Ramsay management technique, but someone was obviously lying so felt the need to put the fear of God into them.

I'm also carb loading, outburst may have a biological base also

Bryan Spondre said...

Carb loading ? You mean eating lots of pies ? :-)

Sadly I don't have staff, our organization is very,very flat. I do have contractors but they have a bad habit of doing their job well so I can't shout at them either.

I have been tempted to use the Gordon Ramsay approach with the gnomes at Adobe software from time to time.

unPC lesbian said...

yes pies...porridge, cookies and scones...ooh and I think I even recall a croissant in the mix too.

Oh Bryan, I feel sorry you. Tell you what, next time I have to ring the non help desk at THS software support, I'll get you to do it. Guaranteed to have you screaming.

Bryan Spondre said...

Presumably this carb loading is in preparation for some sports challenge ? And not an attempt to gain access to some secret society of tubby lesbians.

unPC lesbian said...

errrr, Bryan, you really are a true male....you have completely missed the subtle clue of the word "biological".....

XChequer said...

At least you have a patisserie chef - most hotels these days seem to gloss straight over the specialties and just get one of the line cooks to do it!

XChequer
http://thenzhomeoffice.blogspot.com/

unPC lesbian said...

No XChequer....the word was Pastry chef, more of a euphynism really...just a fancy name for the one who works in the bake room. He struggles to make muffins, scones etc....and anything slightly tricky like the choux pastry for eclairs, danishes, croissants etc are bought in.....if he remembers to order them!!!

Bryan Spondre said...

Freshly baked choux pastries - now thats something that would give me a hard-on :-)

unPC lesbian said...

Sadly Bryan, sometimes the choux pastry items here do resemble what you are referring to.....

Bryan Spondre said...

Oh, dear. At the very least uncircumcised one hopes...

Bryan Spondre said...

FYI: Cream puffs in Venice ( and we aren't talking drag queens):

http://creampuffsinvenice.ca/category/choux-pastry/

 
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