Monday, April 12, 2010

Update on The "One"

At the risk of incurring the wrath of the last anonymous commenter on the original post, I am going to tell of further information I have received re the ex and The "One". And anonymous, just to make it clear for you, this post is about classic lesbian behaviour, not the exe's current relationship. I am simply using it as an example.

Recently a complete stranger asked to be my friend on facebook. As I didn't know this person I looked at their profile carefully and found our mutual friend was the ex. The last time the ex gave my phone number to another it turned into a Very Big Drama so I was a bit wary. However recalling that the ex had mentioned an hilarious Russian I said yes.  It turned out she visits Wellington a lot and wanted to meet one as socially well connected as I (sic) to show her round a bit, and introduce her to Wellington lesbian society. I of course said yes as there is nothing I like better than watching fresh meat being thrown to the masses.

We met for coffee last week and had a very amusing conversation, not all apartments and real estate as I expected. It turns out the Russian had been dating the ex on and off for the last 6 months or so. The ex had wanted it kept quiet, so it was. I take it that things were a bit rocky around January, but the ex and the Russian were still planning to open a business together.

As the ex was a bit down in the dumps, the Russian being a nice person bought her tickets to Melbourne as an early birthday present, so the ex could go to the 40th of her ex referred to in bullet point 1 in the original post. The Russian then flew off on a long planned holiday to Fiji.

This where the new timeline starts.
  • Wednesday ex texts Russian from plane just before it leaves Oz saying thanks, had a great time.
  • Saturday ex texts myself asking information of a sexual nature
  • Sunday ex texts Russian on holiday in Fiji saying "sorry to hurt you but I won't be opening a business with you. I have met someone new" etc etc etc
So in the time between landing on the Wednesday, and texting me on the Saturday, the ex met the love of her life ONLINE, then dumped her current lover, cancelled proposed business plans all before she had met new love in the flesh, or even shagged her.

Way to go - this goes way beyond the normal lesbian second date syndrome and has a whole new category of its own.

 It turns out my vomit comment was the final impetus for the Russian to contact me, she knew then I would find her story hilarious. The rest of the lunch date was spent with the pair of us laughing hysterically over the whole thing.

Does it happen like this in the hetero world?


Anonymous said...

I would like to personally thank you for your post on "the one". I found myself in a relationship quickly after ending an 18 month relationship. Within days it seemed like things were getting really serious way too fast. After reading your post I realized that I was being a complete fool and took a huge step back.

So...thank you.

Phil said...

The One syndrome - online, not met, not shagged(!)is totally loopy. It's the problem of false intimacy that messaging builds up.

You can fall in love with an idealised text version of your partner.

unPC lesbian said...

Aww thank you anonymous, at least someone understands what I'm saying in the posts, and not that I have "moving on" issues.

Ok anonymous I see you fell into the trap of seeing the 'back in the saddle' shag as the start of something new, a la classic lesbian conditioning, "must find someone new, fast!"

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to stay dedicatedly single for the next 6 months. You can date, but that must be with more than one woman. In that time you MUST shag 2 women, ONCE only. No matter how hot the sex is, or how mucgh they beg you must NOT go back for seconds.

After 6 motnhs then reasses your mind may find you no longer want to conform to the lesbian dynamic of a deep and meaningful with one woman only, and are actually enjoying being a single free agent.

Phil, welcome to the bizarre world of lesbian daying.

Phil said...

Wow. Lesbian dating! I thought online dating when you're a 53 y/0 hetero male was complicated.

Re: The One. Nah ... fairy tales. there are hundreds/thousands of Ones out there. It's a matter of being very discriminating and giving each relationship the test of time. Sure lust is fun for a while, but lasting love is about kindness and communication.

unPC lesbian said... least it's far easier for a male hetero to errrrr, shall we say, pay for a date!!!

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